Tricks to Embraced Change

For most of us, change is an unavoidable fact. But in the process, one would learn a lot about how to survive when head-rattling transformations are thrust upon you. Here are some of the tricks I picked up and share with you all.

1. Don’t just do something; sit there.

 

If you’re facing a massive rescaling of your life, your first impulse will be to go into a whirring spin of activity, which is exactly what I did right after I was fired. You will later discovered that there’s a lot of value to sitting quietly instead. In the realm of language learning, there’s a stage called the silent period: Adults may try to avoid going through it, but if you take a kid and plop her down in Paris for a spell, she’ll naturally clam up for a few months. When she opens her mouth, her French will have flowered. Making sense of a major change is a lot like that. You need to allow yourself a fallow period before you can blossom.

 

2. Mother yourself a little.

 

When familiar routines suddenly dissolve, it can seem as if all your supports are gone. It’s crucial, while absorbing the shock of the new, to make yourself feel well taken care of. Prepare nutritious meals for the week ahead. If you can spare the cash, have someone come in and clean the house.
Yes, you need to take some time for yourself, but don’t let the pizza boxes pile up.

 

3. Ignore your inner reptile.

 

There’s a part of the human mind that is often referred to as the “lizard brain,” because it existed in even the earliest land animals. The lizard brain is concerned with survival; it likes the tried and true, so it’s likely to pipe up right now, flooding you with adrenaline warnings of “Danger!” as you veer off course.
This was a handy function to have when deviating from the familiar path to the watering hole may have led to an encounter with a saber-toothed tiger. But in the modern world it’s like a misfiring car alarm: pointless and annoying.

 

4. Silence your inner know-it-all, too.

 

If you’re so smart that you can’t rethink your positions, all your IQ points won’t do you much good when your life is turned upside down. Becker’s advice applies across the board.

 

5. Seek out new perspectives.

 

Zen practitioners cultivate the “don’t know” mind; they work to assume they don’t know anything and in that way see the world fresh. This is a great way to approach change — as an opportunity to start anew, to consider all possibilities.
Ask naive, wide-eyed questions of anyone who is doing anything you might be interested in trying. Listen seriously to arguments you might once have dismissed.

 

6. Try something new and slightly scary.

 

Why? Because now is the time to explore what it is that you really like. Catch yourself off-guard and see what happens. The experience may be elating and terrifying and then you just feel you want to lead a more creative life.

 

7. Be skeptical of common wisdom.

 

It’s dangerous to live in the aggregate, especially when you’re trying to figure out your next move. One year, everyone knows you need an M.B.A. to succeed at anything. The next, they’re saying that there are no jobs out there anyway, so don’t even try. In my case, everyone but I knew that you can’t learn a language at age 43. But since no one alerted me to that fact, that’s what I set my sights on.

 

8. Learn to live with uncertainty.

 

That anxious feeling does not signal that you’re doing something wrong, only that you’re trying something new.

 

9. Say “really?” a lot.

 

When you start to turn this sudden shift in your life to your advantage, you might shake up a lot of people, especially the ones who aren’t happy with how they’re living. To them, your efforts to move forward may feel like a glaring searchlight that needs to be switched off and fast.To their descriptions of the terrible fates that will surely befall you if you dive headlong into a new life, respond with “Really?” Alternatively, “Oh, yeah?” works, too.

 

10. Shed your old skin.

 

Discard physical clutter, tired ideas, old routines. Seeing things through another’s eyes can help. It’s only when you have cast off what has been weighing you down that you can finally move on.

 

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